I’m not there, I’m here. This phrase just came into my mind this morning. I was thinking of all I could be doing. As I sat and scrolled my Instagram feed for the 100th time. As I looked at photos of people at the beach, on vacation, or at a fabulous workout class. As I sat on the couch letting my kid watch yet ANOTHER show to try to buy some time to do some things or procrastinate or whatever the hell it was I was trying to do.
I felt the familiar twinge of the, “oh it must be nice to be “them”” look at where they are, jealousy rearing it’s ugly head. It often does when it comes to social media. I felt the familiar , “the good old days thoughts” like remember when I could just be waking up right now on a Saturday (long gone are those days.) I thought about the one-days, in my dream house we will have a pool.
I’m not there, I’m here.
The words, as if a message directly from God, bringing me back and reminding me. I’m not there, I’m here. Living there won’t serve me. It doesn’t serve the people I love or the ones who are living there either, it’s actually quite useless. It can also be flipped either way. If I turn on the news or talk to friends that are going through particularly hard times, anxiety can overcome me. I need to remind myself I’m not there, I’m here. It is in these moments where I can turn to my faith and my empathy to care for those in need, it’s not when I try to be them, but when I understand I am not them and I love and care for them.
Can we do this?
This is harder than it should be for me, but I bet I’m not alone. The wishing time away, the hoping for the next step, or remembering days gone by all seems a part of the whole ride here. Please say I’m not alone!
I’m going to make this a new mantra of mine, a reminder that when I try to rush or start to get all oh they have it better than me. Just remember I’m not there, I’m here. The crazy part is that where I am right now will one day be a place of my longing. What a shame if I didn’t enjoy it at all.
Here’s to you wherever you are!